


Every Picture Tells A Story, Don't It

by Nightdog_Barks



Category: House M.D.
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crack, Fourth Wall, M/M, Meta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-03-01
Updated: 2007-03-01
Packaged: 2017-10-18 04:39:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/185079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightdog_Barks/pseuds/Nightdog_Barks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's crack.  It's meta.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Every Picture Tells A Story, Don't It

**Author's Note:**

> As I said, this is Meta!Crack. Written late at night, just to see what would happen. But it's sweet, and I do like it.

_**House Crack!Nanofic: Every Picture Tells A Story, Don't It**_  
 **STATUS:** Unpublished, original dated 2/28/07  
 **TITLE:** Every Picture Tells A Story, Don't It  
 **AUTHOR:** [](http://nightdog-writes.livejournal.com/profile)[**nightdog_writes**](http://nightdog-writes.livejournal.com/)  
 **PAIRING:** House/Wilson  
 **RATING:** PG-13  
 **WARNINGS:** Two guys kissing.  
 **SPOILERS:** Nope. It's just a story. Sort of.  
 **SUMMARY:** It's crack. It's meta.  
 **DISCLAIMER:** Don't own 'em. Never will.  
 **AUTHOR NOTES:** As I said, this is Meta!Crack. Written late at night, just to see what would happen. But it's sweet, and I do like it.  
 **BETA:** You've got to be kidding.

  
 **Every Picture Tells A Story, Don't It**

  
"House, I love you," Wilson said. "Will you please kiss me now?"

House twirled his cane in a lazy arc, considering the question. Jimmy's tone had been earnest, his eyes wide and puppy-bright, but still ...

"I don't know," he said at last. "How do I know you won't leave me?"

Wilson poufed his pristine white lab coat away from his waist and sank to his knees in front of House. "Because my name's not Stacy," he pointed out.

"Well, that's true," House agreed. "But how do I know your middle name isn't Stacy and you've been hiding it from me all these years?"

"My middle name is Evan," Wilson replied. "Apparently the writers thought it would be really funny if my initials spelled out 'J.E.W.' Which is tantamount to anti-Semitism if you ask me, but obviously no one did. And what do you mean, all these years? How long have we really known each other?"

House thought for a moment. "I don't know. No one's ever really said."

"So ... we could've known each other for six years, or sixteen years, or sixty --"

"Whoa whoa whoa," House cautioned. "I think you're buying a little too heavily into the author's mindset." He twirled his cane again, a thoughtful expression on his face. "According to her, we've known each other since the heyday of the Roman Empire."

"Do you mind that so much?" Wilson was still on his knees.

"Um ..." House hesitated. "No. The togas are a little revealing, though."

Wilson smiled. It was a relaxed smile, easy and open.

"I think that's what they like," he said softly.

House looked down at him. "It makes them happy, doesn't it?" he asked. His tone held a faint note of uncertainty.

"Yes." Wilson grinned. "It does. Now kiss me."

Taking a deep breath, House stepped forward. Bending slightly from the waist, he cupped the back of Wilson's head and drew him into a slow, loving kiss. When they broke at last, both men were smiling and their eyes glowing with good cheer.

"How was that?" House's voice was low and husky.

Wilson looked down, then up into House's eyes. "Good. It was good." He reached up, taking hold of House's blazer and tugging at it gently. "Now come on," he said softly. "Let's give the good people some more of what they want."

  
~ fin


End file.
